Thursday, October 23, 2008

what NOT to say

now, i have a 6 month old boy

I was just asked

"are you gaining weight or are you pregnant again?"


Sunday, October 5, 2008

oh.. .and totally unrelated....

this sparring totally cracks me up!

what sign are you?

So I took this highly accurate (dude, I found it on the internet and the internet NEVER lies, does it?) quiz and found out:

Your Element Is Earth

You excel at planning and strategizing.

You could be a champ at chess or Survivor.

Well grounded, you are able to be realistic and rationalize.

On the inside, you have a hard core. It's tough to phase you.

You are super productive, and you are able to think anything through.

Focused and super charged, your instincts are a good guide for your next step.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Pity fuck!!!???

Man, that's just sad
Anything named "pity-fuck" is truly saaaad.

Me, i never screw out of pity
I only screw for power! or chocolate...or a clean kitchen, house, etc. Did you know someone did some research that found that wives find their husbands more attractive if the husband does housework? So guys, clean up after yourselves, the pets, kids or whatever and get a little nooky! Hell, clean the whole damn house and you may end up with that long anticipated 3-some your wife promised before she got knocked up and became the mommy/housewife/nobody she thinks she is.
And for that matter, if you feel like you're not getting enough action, hire a sitter and have date night. Nothing gets the engines warm better than a reason to get out of the grungy spit laden sweats like a dinner at a fine (not shoney's guys) restaurant with candle light and wine. She'll get a little warm and tipsy due to the fact she's probably not been able to finish a full drink since the kids showed up. Then she'll realize...DAMN, I've not had sex in forever !!!
And you...yes YOU will be the person she's looking at. And then....don't give her time to look at the house or kids when you get home - actually, have grandma take the kids and you guys get a hotel room close to the restaurant. Because if you have to drive all the way home, she's bound to fall asleep like a 4month old in a carseat!
So, in a way, it is a pity fuck. Your needs are met as well as the needs of your wife. You get laid and she gets to feel like a grownup again

so ok
pity fuck me - please